Lazy Shorts: A Chatty Dawood and Disaster Prince Girish Kumar




India wants to capture He-who-must-not-be-named aka Iqbal aka Goldman (Rishi Kapoor). Wali Khan (Irrfan) has been an undercover agent for India in Pakistan for 9 years. He has a family and leads a double life of a barber. When information reaches intelligence that Goldman will be dismissing protocol and attending his son’s wedding, Ex-army man Singh (Arjun Rampal), bomb specialist Zoya (Huma Qureshi), and ex-convict Aslam are sent over for the Operation. But things go wrong. All hell breaks loose when both the Pakistani and Indian intelligence want the four of them dead. They have to persist, stay alive, and try to give the Operation one last shot. Will they succeed?

With an impressive cast and excellent crew, the film has an extremely promising start. The narrative progression is interesting and you are actually hooked enough to want to see where it is all going. Barring Shruti Hassan, the cast gives an admirable performance (I will be slightly partial. Apologies. You lose objectivity when you see Arjun Rampal and Irrfan Khan in the same frame), ably supported by the secondary characters. Although, I wish Huma Qureshi and Chandan Roy Sanyal had more screen time. The second half staggers due to sluggish editing and one extremely ridiculous reason – a chatty gangster. Rishi Kapoor is on a verbal diarrhea at places, talking way too much than any normal World No. 2 Terrorist would talk. Picture this: Three Indian agents are holding Goldman (*cough* Dawood *cough*) in a dilapidated farm house in the middle of a desert near the Indian border and – are serving him dinner! Crockery and tables and chairs et al! And the altercation where he tries to convince Wali to call his family is downright absurd. The stolidity and brooding personality that the first half deliciously creates for Kapoor’s character, a mysterious super power behind shadows and rose-tinted shades, suddenly becomes a chatty, irritating minion. Unfortunate.


The music is impressive with a respectable version of Mast Qalandar. The script and dialogues should be applauded too. The cinematography is effectively gritty and if the editing department had been more supportive, this would have been a kickass thriller. Nikhil Advani, known till date as Bollywood’s best example of amazing-debut-pathetic-filmography finally redeems himself. It is heartening to know that he might have the talent for film making in him. D-Day might just be his real debut after all.



Ramaiya Vastavaiya

Poor-girl-rich-boy-fallsinloveinasecond-boy’s-family-insults-her-boy-comes-to-village (random item number in the middle of mustard fields)-to-prove-his-love-goesthroughalotofbullshit-wins-challenge-put-down-by-girl’s-brother-lustyjealousangryvillainsattack-dhishoom-dhishoom-wham-bam-boy-kills-villain-brother-takes-responsibility-goes-to-jail-for-seven(!!!)-years-is-released-marriage-everybodyhappy.

I have no idea where Shruti Hassan’s talented acting genes disappeared. Did she poop them all out one day?

Prabhudeva, Sir, with all due respect, don’t direct films.

Sonu Sood, why you waste your talent?

Girish Kumar – Really, kid? This is what you choose for a debut? Haven’t you seen films enough to know that what you did in RV is of the worst, bullshitest, shitfestest order?! This film should have been burned in the cans. Take my advice: Train yourself for a few years and save yourself from becoming the next Tusshar Kapoor. Also, you are good looking. I am sure you don’t need to star in a film to get laid. And, you also have money (rich dad). Then, if being a good actor is not what you want to achieve, why on earth are you choosing this career? Fame?


KRK is famous. Fame comes very easy these days. Easier than sex, actually.

So, please, get your priorities in order, dude. And if you still want to be an actor, we will be looking forward to another debut – this time, a REAL one.


One thought on “Lazy Shorts: A Chatty Dawood and Disaster Prince Girish Kumar

  1. Pingback: What the FINGER Awards – Bollywood Wall of Shame, 2013 | The Lazy Critic Blog

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